Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
