worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
