do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
