I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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