My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
