This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
