i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
what is it with giant penises always finding me
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Randomize