These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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