Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
please come you make the beer taste better
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize