Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
You can't motorboat a personality
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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