there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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