Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize