I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
