Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
