The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
It's official drugs can't kill me
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
