Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
They took my balls.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
