he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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