NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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