I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize