Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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