Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I woke up under a house in Key West
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
