Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
