i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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