Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
