My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
