And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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