I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
