If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
