Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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