i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
