everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
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