like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
