How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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