did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
