Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Randomize
