yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
