I'm so fucking centered right now
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
