i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
