Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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