You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
