I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
