remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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