The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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