I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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