I got chris browned last night
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
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