god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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