Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
