So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
are you so shy because you have an std?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
