I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I am one with the molecules
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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