from now on my penis is your penis
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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